Cannabis Product Review: Cheetah Piss from Cookies

by Carrie Dabshaw
Cheetah Piss review from Emjay, Cookies

Cookies Cheetah Piss At-A-Glance

Highlights

Cookies offers a fascinating combination of mental, physical, and emotional sensation with this killer.

Price

Worth every penny of the 55 dollars. 

Effects

A unique, fascinating dynamic experience awaits in the big cat's den.

About Cheetah Piss from Cookies

Cheetah Piss. CHEETAH. Piss.

Not exactly the first, second, third….maybe even 500th word or word combination you’d reach for when you’re considering what you should put in your body. 

For the Joe Exotics and Carole Baskins among us, this spin-off cat piss takes a big swing on elevating a gross concept. Like sommeliers who, yes actually do praise Sauv Blanc for having said feline excrement odor, cat piss has somehow made its way into the lexicon of cannabis quality. 

As far as animals go, however, it does seem the mighty Cheetah would have probably the best piss of all the big cats. An apex predator who deftly avoids the lions vs tigers debate seems astute in ruling their given territory. 

Luckily, Cookies represents a brand and food that is the polar opposite of mammalian micturition. The Cookies Fam is comprised of Cookies, Lemonade, and Fiore-a powerhouse trio of mouthwatering and beloved cannabis brands that enjoy wildfire popularity. Cookies, founded by Hip Hop artist Berner and the Cookies Fam is known and heralded for their quality and bold ask the consumer to kiss the ring with this audaciously named offering.

Highlights

Completely counterbalancing the grossness of its name, the packaging for Cheetah Piss is simply stunning. Truly astonishing psychedelic artistry presents a regal, intricate and provocative portrait more befitting an art gallery than a product label. The big cat is enmeshed and intertwined with all walks of floral life that run the gambit of the color gradient. The regal cheetah wears a crown centerpiece of cannabis and is bookended by pillars evoking a throne.

On both sides of these pillars, more mystery.  An intricate pattern of greens and pinks forms an ambiguous backdrop. Perhaps a psychedelic mandala of crowns or flowers blooming, perhaps, a snake wrapping itself into infinity, maybe two mystical coins. Cookies leaves it up to the audience to determine what they are looking at. And it’s fun not to know. 

Below this majestic madness is the strain’s name in ransom note magazine cut-out lettering. An added layer of “what the fuck?!” for the viewer. 

After completely adoring every aspect of Cookie’s Gary Payton label and strain, I am very interested to see what will come of this seductive and risk-taking offering.

Cheetah Piss from Cookies, Emjay review

Effects

“Open the bag of Cheetah Piss and take a big whiff” is not something I ever anticipated encouraging a group of strangers on the internet to do but life is unexpected and here we are.

Do not be alarmed, dear reader, for inside this stout bag of cheetah piss is a world of mystical sights and scents. 

Like the design on the cover, the smell is hard to put into words. It feels familiar but you just can’t put your finger on it. 

I got notes of pineapple, funky cheese, the highest note of gas, and some floral perfume. 

The flower is stunning-thick, cheesy trichomes, healthy tightly packed buds,  lots of deep greens and a sea of orange hairs. This looks like the flower they’d use on a movie set to represent the fantasy weed that keeps Cheech & Chong up at night. 

Grinding up the Cheetah reveals a more docile character light greens and white make for a visually appealing and reassuring ocular feast. It seems very much of the Earth.

A lightly floral almost citrusy gas meets you on the inhale when you use a hemp wick to light the bowl. In a blunt or jay not much of a tasting note would likely come through. The feel of the smoke is very nice-smooth and sitting at the top of your mouth instead of the straight back to the throat exhaust some lower grade flower gives off. 

There is something very loving and comforting about the way Cheetah high hits the system. The chakras are invigorated, not muted.  In low dosages, the mind is at ease and the spirit stirred. In higher doses, the body effects become more notable and the mind quieter.

This is the ideal strain if you seek an alternative to corporate pharmaceutical chemicals for mood elevation. 

Or if you’re trying to quit cigarettes I’d roll a bunch of these up with mouthpieces and use the 23% of uplifting THC as an awesome alternative.

In a really fascinating way, the high takes several twists and turns into a varied but balanced progression. It weaves you through several filters of consciousness in a winded mountain round kind of way.

Price

$55 is a great deal for its quality. Definitely worth keeping around as a special occasion smoke if you don’t want to spend this much regularly. 

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