Maracuja Helado At-A-Glance
About TasteDeezTreats’ Maracuja
The genetics powering Lyfted Farms’ magnificent vertical integration, TasteDeezTreets is an exciting and enticing addition to the California cannabis cannon with their inventive Helado series-the gorgeous Maracuja featured here, Pink Helado, and the Emjay Exclusive Uvas Helado. Invoking the untamed delight of paletas and some next-level imagery, TasteDeez nails a seductive aesthetic backed by unfettered quality.
With a handful of gorgeously designed merch items, TasteDeez seems invested in minding their business and focusing on genetics. It is very gutsy to release a top-tier product with no information about what that elevated price point gets you. DeezTreats risk it all on the power of the aesthetic and the quality to back it up.
In league with several Cookies locations and placed right next to them on the top shelf at Sherbinskis it’s clear DeezTreats are doin’ something right. So let’s not overthink it and dig in quickly before the gorgeous thing melts.
TasteDeezTreats “About Us” section links to the stock paragraph provided on how to use the “About Us” section. This is a hilarious detail that somehow makes DeezTreats more enticing. Is this the accident that it seems? Or is this a middle finger to the competition perhaps perusing with nefarious intent. With cannabis (still) federally illegal, successfully registering a patent on your hard work can be nearly impossible. Are they keeping their enemies in the dark to keep the Krabby Patty recipe secret?
TasteDeez bravely brandishes a complete lack of fucks to give. From the irreverent and borderline nasty naming to the completely opaque consumer experience (it seems almost no reliable information exists on what’s behind the curtain at TasteDeez) DeezTreats are a bold counterpoint to the hyper nuanced inventory many brands take of their flower. From their selection practices to their foundational credo, TasteDeez seems determined to play things close to the chest.
Let’s see if they earn their right to not say a peep.
If Maracuja smells and tastes a third of as good as it looks, I’m in. The bag snatches the limelight from every product surrounding it and looks more like a graphic novel than a product label with its supersaturated and lively cover. If they haven’t already offered these as actual food I hope someday they do and I get the pleasure of consuming them.
Inside the treasure chest somehow Maracuja lives up to its name. There was a special edition of Starburst (or maybe it’s just in the regular tropical pack?) with a Passion Fruit flavor and that is exactly what my mind went to went I took a whiff of this. Maracuja is the pink starburst of weed and that may be the highest compliment I can give. Bright delicious tropical fruit hits the nose with a faint lively herbal pop. This smell should come in candle form and I would buy one for everyone I love.
Miraculously, Maracuja looks as good as it smells. A subtle bed of purple is a loving and grounding host for the sea of greens and snowcapped trichoming. The buds are dense and seem glued together by the thick trichome crystals. Orange hairs look like the veins of this elegant creature and jut out in bolts of electricity at points. The brilliant artwork on the cover does not oversell the aromatic and visual delights inside. Maracuja delivers.
After grinding it up, the flower smells even better. Maracuja’s inhale might be the single best and single most interesting I’ve ever experienced. The ripe bright tropical fruit notes come through clearly on the exhale-there is no excuse to not use a hemp wick for this one. There’s a surprisingly herbal/pepper background note that makes the taste really irresistible.
Getting the bowl cherried and hitting your pipe feels like subsequent licks of a delicious treat that just keeps getting better. Do not waste Maracuja on blunt force-skip the bong or vape and take this in a hand pipe or bubbler to really savor the experience. I swear on some of my hits I got mouthfuls of banana-whatever DeezTreats are doing to perform this alchemy I am so glad they are protecting their IP. This is a break through.
Maracuja’s high deftly unwinds and releases every fuck you thought you had left to give. Like Gotham’s most notorious Super Villian, Maracuja seductively inquires: why so serious? Maracuja is a vibe and like Kendrick sang, you won’t let anybody kill it. Save this for times when you have no responsibility and no drama will be present. Use Maracuja for me-time when you are hoping to zone everybody else out.
In a word: sheeeesh.
Maracuja exceeds the price point on every possible metric-$60 lowballs it.